So something that has been no my mind the last few weeks is the fact that I have some amazing examples in my life. I have two loving parents that were married in the temple and have 5 great kids that are all active in the church. I have amazing grandparents that have taught my parents the gospel in order for them to teach us kids. I have aunts and uncles that are strong in their marriages and in the gospel. So with all of these amazing examples why is it so hard. why can't I seem to make a decision,why when life seems good and you think that you have it all figured out then something comes along that makes you rethink what you have always known. I'm not talking about my testimony I know that the Church is true. I'm talking about the constant reminder that YES I'm single and, that it is not easy. My grandparents, parents and aunt and uncles found love and made things work why is it so hard to find for me? Even now that I am dating someone 3000 miles away from me (Which is another story all together) it is even harder. ans I'm still having people try and make my choices for me. I thought we fought for the right to choose in the preexistence, but were is my choice now. My mom and his mom had their dream wedding and got to make all the choices on there own. They got to have it were they wanted and how they wanted it WHY CAN'T I? I'm not saying that I'm getting married or that there is even a ring on my finger or even the prospect at this time. I am saying that I want to make the choices. I don't know maybe it is not worth the constant struggle and the battle and the whole thing is a waist of time. but it is something that as a young girl you dream about your whole life. I just want it to be my way and be my perfect day. AHHHHHH!!! I really have no more to say I think I have talked this one to death, and still I have no answers. I guess the only answer is patients, cause that is the answer I always get. So until my next freak out about the relationship that I am in and have no idea where it is taking me advice is welcomed.